Toris's overwhelming depression
by XXRikuXXAxelXX
Summary: Belarus does something drastic and it effects everyone. I don't want to give anything but I kinda have to here. WARNING: Suicide/death warning. Very small rape scene. Mention but no details on PolandXAmerica. Human names used, well for the most part. There is very minimal cussing, M just to be safe, nothing to bad to make it rated that, I just don't want to risk it.


The day I decided to give up was gloomy and dark, both in weather and emotions. Natalya had cussed at me to go away again. I ran but eventally I had to return, so there I was returning. I walked to the house of the man I feared most in the world. The house of Ivan, Natalya's older brother. The man who tortured Feliks and I for years during wars. Feliks himself was at the door with a pink piece of paper in his hand. I looked at the blonde in confusion.

"Feliks what is wrong?" I asked running up to the nation. His eyes widened as he looked up at me.

"Toris!" He screamed and hugged me, getting tears all over my usual green jacket. "It is like totally horrible man."

"What are you talking about? I just came over to give Natalya her knife, she kinda left it in my back the other day." I explained. "I'll be right back." I said pushing into the house. Ivan and Yekaterina standing by the bathroom door in the west wing. I walked over to them holding Natalya's favorite knife in my hands. "Ivan! Yekaterina! I have Natalya's knife, she stabbed me with it a few days ago and I came to bring it back." I said looking at them. They didn't respond they continued to stare into the bathroom. I looked into the bathroom, the horrifying sight knocked me off my feet, They collapsed under me. Ivan turned to me.

"You shouldn't be here." He said looking at me on the floor. Feliks rushed to my aid when he saw I had fell. He put his hands grabbed under my arms to lift me. In his process to pick me up Ivan slammed his hand into the Polacks cheek. Feliks stumbled back, dropping me. "Leave him, he should stare at the mess he caused." Ivan said before grabbing my hair. He made me look into his violet eyes before dragging me on my knees to the bloody bathroom. "This is your fault Toris." He said slamming my face into the bloody floor. Her bloody body in front of me. My hope that she'd eventually love me was now gone, she was gone for that matter, she escaped this earth the way I was wishing to. Yekaterina looked away as her brother beat me senseless. Feliks stood back, not risking serious injury. Ivan pulled some brown hairs off my head as he slammed my face in the floor once again, my nose now broken.

"I'm sorry I caused this sir Ivan." I choked out. Ludwig escorted Alfred into the mess of the bathroom that I was currently being killed in.

"Okay I am here to read ze note." Germany said, for the first time I heard weakness in his voice. He picked up the blood soaked note from her dead grip.

The note read:

To everyone:

Firstly to big bruder I will miss you more than you can believe. Big sister, you may have been the reason brother didn't love me but even so I loved being your little sister. To America, I leave you all my worldly possessions except for one(to be named later). And Poland, I'm sorry for being a huge jerk. And last but certainly not least, Lithuania, my sweet Toris. I love you...I wanted to tell you this before but you'd get too emotionally attached, I leave you the one thing I am not leaving to America, in a small jewelry box there is a locket it has a picture of me and you in it, from back when we were still developing. I will always love you, I won't see you where I'm going because you are too good to be here. But I hope you will forgive me for everything that I have put you through, please don't hate me. I love you Toris...Goodbye...

With Love,

Natalya Arlovskaya

I shivered at the chill the note sent me. Ivan looked even more pissed. He slammed the side of my head into the ground. I screamed out in pain, the first time I had ever let out a scream in Ivan's presence. Ivan stopped and removed his hands from my neck. He got off me, now realizing how much pain I was in.

"Wait Broski, so she like loved you, like for real?" Feliks questioned.

"Zat is vat the note said." Ludwig said. Alfred and Yekaterina were crying in each other's arms. I was hissing in large gulps of air, feeling blood rush to my head.

"You basard!" The Russian screamed his foot driving into my back, I held in a scream. Ludwig left the bathroom, I was the only one who noticed.

"Get off me!" I yelled back grabbing Ivan's ankle and pushed him off of me and out of the bathroom. Ludwig returned, the jewelry box that Natalya had mentioned in her note. Poland came to my side, helping me stand up. Ludwig opened the box and took the locket out. He put it around my neck, carefully. Ludwig looked weak, torn. Alfred flinched as he heard Ivan growl.

"Toris. My office. Now." Ivan said, his voice harsh. I held my nose.

"Yessir." I obeyed, my words slurring together. I went into his office, he followed hot on my trail. The door slammed behind us loadly.

"You know what to do runt." He commanded in a booming voice. I nodded and leaned over the desk, biting on the wood. I pulled my pants down so they pooled around my ankles. I heard his belt unbuckle. I felt his hands on my waist. I squeezed my eyes shut as he entered me. I screamed slightly into the wood, the pain was so much. My body was burning all over as he violated me. My teeth disconnect from the desk, a shriek tearing out of my throat as he spanked me and hit my spot roughly. "Scream."

"AH! IVAN! I'M SO SORRY WILL YOU EVER FORGIVE ME!" I screamed out. Everything I ever was deteriorated right before my eyes, I was aching and no one could save me, not even death at this point.

"What do you want?" He whispered so quietly it was scary.

"Fuck me harder!" I yelped. He obliged and I was pounded into harder. I didn't really want any of this, but if I told him to pull out he'd rip my ass in half. I played the dirty slut role so well, because I have gone through this so many times before. I felt my mind start to slip. It was leaving me, I was blacking out. This wasn't good. And there I went, I was gone. Everything was black. Was I dead? Was there nothing left for poor old Toris? Was my torment of life finally over?

Sadly, I awoke. I was laying on the floor in Ivan's office, in a pool of blood. I kept my eyes closed willing everything to just end. My mind was so blank and I forgot what I did this time, but then it hit me like a ton of bricks to the forhead. Natalya is dead. The only joys in my pathetic existance was talking to Feliks and getting the chance to see Natalya everyday, even if it meant she would beat the living crap out of me. I finally opened my eyes, went I felt someone touch my hair soothingly. I hoped it was Natalya back from the dead but when I looked I only saw Yekaterina. I let out a shakey sigh, relaxing into her touch.

"How badly are you hurt?" She asked, her voice was weak and fragile.

"Bad." was all I could choke out as I sat up, I saw she had a large first aid kit by her side. She opened it and binded my broken nose in place.

"Should I call a hospital?" She asked as she patched me up.

"No, I will be fine." I lied, maybe if I let the wounds go to long without having medical attention I will die the way I came into this world. Painfully.

"Did you really love her?" Yekaterina asked, looking at me.

"Yes." I said. It was simple and true.

"Alfred and Poland are spending the night in Natalya's room, you can feel free to join them if you like. I won't tell Ivan, just make sure you leave before he wakes up, I don't want you to go through this again." She rambled as she stood and helped me up. She was strong for a woman but nothing like the strength of Natalya. She left me in Ivan's office. I stood there for a minute, looking at my options. I decided to go to Natalya's room and take a look around but not to stay, it would probably be to painful anyway.

I dragged my hurt body to her room. Alfred was on her bed, Feliks in his arms, they were both sleeping. I was quiet as I looked around the room, I had never been in here. I looked at every picture on the wall. There was a combination of American music and Russian. My eyes ran along every picture of Vlad Topalov and all the Gerard Way photos. I scoffed thinking it was Alfred who had taught her the american bands, she'd never know them otherwise. There was shuffling behind me. I stiffened as a hand touched my shoulder. It was Feliks. I let out a sigh of relief.

"Are you okay, Broski?" He questioned. I looked at him, noticing he was only wearing boxers. The realization hit me.

"Feliks, Tell me you didn't." My lips trembled. He glanced back at Alfred, wearing a guilty expression. "In here? With her best friend?" I added.

"We couldn't like help it you know, bro?" He confessed. I was utterly digusted, I turned from the room and left. I just left Feliks standing there.

I didn't care. I didn't have anyone. My crush was gone. My best friend was with someone now. I was terrified of the only man who would touch me. I was alone in this big world. I walked home. Dispite the dull pain in my legs. I grabbed a few things from there and I knew this was it, I was trying to run away. That was it. I was trying to leave behind the only life I've ever known. When I gathered the minimal items I needed I left my house. I wasn't sure where I was going but I couldn't stand being here any longer. I ran from my problems.

I walked down the street, just walking. I ended up collapsing. I was crying by the time I hit the ground. I laid there. I heard a car coming, it didn't scare me. It hit me. I was being run over, it didn't see me and I don't blame it. A white haired albino got out of the car and looked at me.

"Oh man are you going to be ok?" The albino asked. But no I wasn't my chest was crushed and my ribs punctured my heart and I was dying. I died so quickly and it was over. I was done. Goodbye Cruel World.


End file.
